Pool party

Monday:

This morning I weighed 72.8 kg. A dramatic loss of.... (drumroll please) 0.1 kg for the week. I suppose it's better than the gain I'd been showing most of the week. But very unimpressive.

I'm still feeling a bit yuck with flu, achy and sore throat, and Tim was feeling off yesterday too. He went to work today though.

Jasmine had her pool party yesterday (actual birthday tomorrow) and it was a great success. I didn't take photos because it seemed a bit intrusive considering they were all in swimming costumes the whole time. But I did get a photo of the (very expensive) gelato cake.

Jasmine is badly sunburned on her face and arms, and so is the girl who stayed for a sleepover. Not sure about the ones who left after the party. I hope they are not too bad. They all had sunscreen on, but were out in the Australian sun for several hours. I guess we should have had the party later in the day, but it was such lovely weather for a pool party! I went swimming after the girls left, and the water was almost too warm to be refreshing. There is no shade out there until quite late in the afternoon, this time of year. I feel guilty, I should have planned better somehow. At least they all seemed to have a great time, constant shouting and squealing.

Missing the party

Saturday:

I’m trying to remember what I did this week... Tim was back at work but the kids were on their last full week of summer holidays. We shopped for new school shoes, swam in the pool, worked in the garden, and saw The Greatest Showman which is loosely based on the life of P.T. Barnam, very enjoyable with some great music. The kids completely missed the reason Zac Efron’s character was ostracised for liking the acrobat girl (he was white, she was black, didn’t occur to my kids that could be a problem) and they were also surprised a fat man appeared in a freak show - I had to explain obesity was much less common 150 years ago.

Emotionally I’ve been fine, increasing carbs seems to have done the trick. Unfortunately I’ve also increased total calories a bit and my weight drifted back up, I don’t really see how that is possible as I’m still eating well below what I use/burn each day. But these fluctuations happen. I have one more week of Duromine then I’ll have to decide if it’s worth continuing if I’m not losing weight. I definitely haven’t had as good an experience with it this time round.

I felt a bit unwell when I got up this morning; aching back, neck and legs. Tim reminded me I’d worked hard in the garden yesterday and it was probably muscle soreness from that, so I went off shopping as planned. It’s Jasmine’s birthday next week and we hadn’t got any presents yet - her main present ordered online may or may not get here on time because the company had a long shutdown over Christmas/New Year. I managed to get some nice things for her but felt increasingly unwell and I think I have the flu. I’ve stayed home this evening while Tim and the kids are out at Tim’s dad’s 70 th birthday party.

I’m sorry to miss it, it’s quite a big event, with a room hired and food catered and a string quartet, and all the family and friends there. Ten years ago I was there at his 60th, Des gave a long but entertaining speech about his life - he said usually people hear about all that stuff from someone else at the funeral but he thought it was nicer to tell us himself. He’s very much a talker, he could draw a random subject out of a hat and lecture for an hour, making stuff up if he didn’t know! I always leave the room when he gets on to politics. At his 60th he gave a 45 minute talk, with slides, between dinner and dessert. The speech was good, but I had to stare at a buffet laden with desserts that I wasn’t allowed to eat yet! Torture.

I hope I’m better by tomorrow, Jasmine’s having her birthday pool party here. I’ll have an early night.

More carbs

Monday

Another 0.7 kg down this week, to 72.9 kg. Still heading in the right direction.

I had a hard week. I got quite depressed, although the only external factor was being at a bit of a loose end on holidays too long with nothing to aim for until TAFE starts again. But the depression was like a brain fog, I sat around all day and didn't want to do anything. No energy, no motivation. Tim took the kids bowling, putt putt (mini golf), played board games with them. I didn't join in anything. I spent a lot of time just sitting, reading or staring at the TV. I was a bit sad but mostly just empty, like I was waiting for my life to start.

The obvious first possibility of culprit was the Duromine (phentermine). It's not a particularly common side effect but it does happen. Forum advice was that tryptophan can help with serotonin production, but tryptophan is not readily available in Australia. I was pretty much decided to stop taking the Duromine but tried one other thing first. I've been eating low carb, it does help me lose weight but it has messed with my mood in the past, notably in the six week hell before my wedding, after which my husband said I was never allowed to go low carb again. I was miserable and grumpy the whole time. Not even sure why I even tried it again - oh yes I do it's because the weight loss forum I'm on pushes it pretty hard. I'd been low-carbing since the New Year, three weeks now.

On the weekend I increased my carbs a bit, while still keeping calories low. And guess what. My mood improved immensely. I feel totally back to normal after two days of the occasional slice of toast, roast potato, or bunch of grapes. And eating that way didn't even seem to hurt the weight loss, most of this week's 0.7 kg loss was dropped over the weekend.

The Blood Sugar Diet that I am doing is Mediterranean and doesn't actually mention carb limits, it talks about using rice, pasta etc in small amounts as a taste rather than the main part of the meal. A lot of the recipes included have carby vegetables and beans etc. But a lot of the people on the forum (some now successfully in maintenance for over a year) are evangelical about the benefits of super-low carb and I guess I got caught up in that a bit. I never went super-low, but even low was too low for me. It probably caused my dizziness last week too.

More active

Monday:

Today I weigh 73.6 kg, a loss of 0.4 kg this week. I’m quite disappointed with that, considering I kept my calories low all week. But I did eat too many carbs, didn’t drink enough water, and didn’t exercise because I continued to feel a bit sick and dizzy on and off through the week. I don’t know if it was a virus or side effects of Duromine. Oh well, I just keep going from here.

Today was more active than I have been all week. I did over an hour of gardening, mainly weeding which isn’t very strenuous but it was something, and the really good thing was I wasn’t getting dizzy every time I straightened up like I did last week. Tim and the kids joined me for the second half of that time and we got the whole back and side yards weeded which was a real achievement.

In the afternoon we all carried junk down to the curb, the pick-up I arranged a couple of months ago has finally come round so we’re finally rid of the broken wheelbarrow and miscellaneous other stuff that wouldn’t fit in the bins. Or we will be assuming the council collect it tomorrow as arranged.

I also did the grocery shopping! So I spent a lot less time sitting than I have for the past week, which can only be a good thing.

Sick and grumpy

Thursday:

It’s turns out feeling a bit weak and dizzy on Monday was merely the precursor to nastier things. I woke on Tuesday with no energy and an aching back, but I forced myself to do some gentle exercise because I hadn’t for days, and it actually seemed to help my back. But then around 11:00am the waves of nausea started. I spent the rest of the day in bad (or the bathroom!). I had taken a Duromine in the morning which was probably the reason why I wasn’t able to nap, I just lay on the bed feeling awful.

Wednesday I was just tired and achy, and was able to nap both morning and afternoon (no Duromine) but I was miserable despite not feeling very sick. Sad and irritable and frustrated and teary and bored. Not a fun day. In the afternoon we went and saw Jumanji, I didn’t really feel like it but I figured I would just be sitting and it turned out ok. Better than staring at the wall at home. I ate quite a few non-diet foods throughout the day. Nothing to do with hunger, 100% emotional eating. At one point I was eating cheese and crackers grumpily because Tim made too much noise while I was having my afternoon nap and woke me up. I was eating to punish him. And that works because....?

Anyway, I feel much better today both physically and mentally, although I’ve been sitting all morning so I guess I’m not exactly bursting with energy. I didn’t drink enough over the past couple of days because my stomach didn’t seem to like it, so I’m working on replacing fluids today.

New low

Monday:

My weight this morning was 74.0 kg, a loss of 1.4 kg for the week (1.0 since I started Duromine on Thursday). I’m very happy with that. It’s the lightest I’ve been for a very long time. Now I have 5 kg to lose to be at my wedding weight from 15 years ago, so that is my current goal. Actually I went on a diet before my wedding and lost 5 kg, so I guess I’m the same weight now as I was a couple of months before I got married.

Tim said this morning that I am radiating thin-ness. Isn’t that lovely!

The weather was more bearable today, in the 30s instead of the 40s. Had a lovely swim in the afternoon. I was feeling a bit dizzy and weak in the morning which could be my medication or could be allergies, Tim is suffering badly from hay fever atm and I do get that to a lesser extent. I feel ok now though, either way.

Hot weekend

Saturday:

I started the day with some really sweaty and strenuous gardening. Tim always mows the big front lawn but the new turf by the pool is up too many stairs to take up the big petrol mower and I insisted on getting a little push mower so I often do it (Tim sometimes does). It's super hot here so I went out early but it was still blazing hot, especially pushing the mower and stooping to trim edges. It may not sound like hard work but it was! I only got it half done but the heat was too much for me by then I was getting bit dizzy.

I had a bit of trouble getting to sleep last night but not as bad as the first night I think, and still dry mouth today but again not as bad as yesterday. Still good energy and appetite suppression.

Sunday:

My aunt and uncle (on my dad’s side) came visiting for lunch and brought three grandchildren (my cousin’s children) similar ages to my kids. It was over 40C so the kids were in the pool most of the time but none of the adults even wanted to step outside. Tim’s dad and Jo came over too, which was great as it spread the talking around a bit. Five hours can seem quite long! The kids all had a fantastic time though. I hope no one got too sunburned, we made they keep applying sunscreen.

I was really excellent with my food until just after they left when I shovelled in some chips. Then poured the rest in the bin. Not too much damage.

Tim’s brother is putting up a shed in his little backyard, apparently it had to be today (hottest Sydney day in 158 years in many suburbs) because he is going back to work tomorrow. So Tim is over there now in the afternoon heat helping. Crazy.

Last night I finally got a good night’s sleep. A bit queasy today at times, and still dry mouth but not as bad.

Taronga Zoo

Friday:

We went to the zoo yesterday. It's quite a long trip; car, train, train, ferry then a very short bus ride up the hill. About two hours each way. But the ferry ride across Sydney Harbour is fun. Taronga Zoo is on a slope right next to the harbour. The giraffes have excellent views! The bus takes you to the top of the hill and you walk zig zag down to the ferry again. We spent about three hours meandering slowly and watching the animals. It was cool and cloudy, which was nice for walking, but the sun came out in the afternoon. I got a bit burned around my collarbone despite sunscreen.

The Komodo dragon is always impressive.

Giraffes with a view of the city across the harbour.

A binturong, otherwise known as a bearcat, from South-East Asia. I've never heard of them except for this solitary one we have at the zoo.

There are some natural-ish new enclosures but still some rather small and dismal old ones. They gradually upgrade all the time. They have guided walks through some of the 'friendly animal' enclosures like lemurs, and there was some kind of tour of the tiger enclosure but with a half hour wait which we weren't prepared to do, and you couldn't see the tiger/s at all from outside which was disappointing. No other big cats at all. I'm sure they used to have lions last time and leopards or something. Actually quite a few animals I remembered from several years ago seemed to be missing. Maybe as they make exhibits larger they have to cut down on which animals they keep. There was an area fenced off where they were working on an African Savannah, something to look forward to next time.

I started Duromine (phentermine) again yesterday. Good appetite suppression, a bit of extra energy. I didn't sleep at all well last night, it might take a few days to get past the insomnia. The dry mouth returned today. At least it ensures I drink a lot!

Round two of Duromine

Wednesday:

We’ve had a quiet start to 2018. Mostly at home. We went to the movies yesterday, Pitch Perfect 3 which I really enjoyed.

I’ve been focusing on my diet - sometimes it feels like a full-time job, you know? Planning meals, cooking, thinking about food, how much can I eat, can I ‘afford’ a snack, hungry - or not hungry but want to eat anyway.... eating less but thinking about food even more than usual, if that is even possible!

Anyway, my diet-related news is that I’m starting Duromine (phentermine) again tomorrow. I had good if not dramatic results last time with minimal side effects. I’ve always planned to probably try it again after my body had a break to reset after the last course, as it wasn’t working much for me by the end, my body had got used to it. I had one pill left in the box and I took it a few days before New Year. Ate less, more energy. Definitely seemed worth taking again. I saw my doctor yesterday, she was very pleased that I’d maintained the loss for two months and gave me a one-month script. I picked up the pills this afternoon. Something that makes me not think about food constantly just makes life so much easier. And last time it relieved my peri-menopause symptoms too.